Still learning

omg, i cant believe its been so long since i last blogged, its weird how the older I'm getting the faster life is becoming. The last few months have been one fast roller coaster.



1st was the end of mainstream preschool, she had been going since January 2 afternoons a week with her ht, which she so loved & really came on so for the last few weeks before it finished before summer, i sent her in 1 afternoon on her own & my worries eased away, she loved it. So as it was finishing for the summer, i was looking so forward to her having a break from things because she was being so good working hard all year, now we are back to September my naivety has been Quashed and i will never again wish the summer holidays sooner than they should be, as it was really an eye opening reality, butterfly struggled really really hard and i wasn't helping with the fact i wasn't keeping up with the routines, in the start of Aug, there was a death in the family, my mams younger sister so to be honest it was a struggle to deal with grief and watch my family deal with this blow so i tried to keep butterfly amused myself which was hard as nothing was i was doing was right but we made it and woo hoo, its September again and now its mornings in preschool.



She is going wed, Thurs & Fri 8.45am-11.45am & guess what, she is happy again. her Home tutor is with her like an angel in the background guiding her & teaching her.



2nd thing was our holidays, again i was stupidly naive i could have it all, my parents, my 2 sisters & their husbands were going on a week med cruise so i decided we`d tag along. so i got down to googling images of plane, the boat, even pics of inside the boat of the restaurants, bars, swimming pools, bedrooms, you name it i did it, so i made a little travel comic book of our impending holiday, with what was happening step by step in pictures, and with the help of our Home tutor we started showing butterfly what was going to happen well in advance. June came & airport went great, even the the 2 days in Barcelona was great, then it was time for the ship, now i told her it would be big & it was huge so she held her grandads hand boarding while i had buggy. when we entered we were told we`d be shown our cabins so butterfly had to watch as every1 was separated and we went to our room, well she didn't like that and that was the beginning of how hard it became, the ship is 20 floors, and we always had to go the same route that she remembered from that 1st time, she`d get upset if some1 called the lift before her, she copped on that the butter, potatoes, bread wasn't the same as home so she stopped eating for 4 days & became very sick as a result that we had to stay in cabin for 3 days & visited ships doctor, who was very kind & didn't even charge us after i explained her autism, the only thing she had was the biscuits & crisps that we packed away, she wouldn't even touch their fruit, i know what your thinking now, holiday horror but i never ever did, sure i was nearly divorced at one stage & did snap once and told butterfly that she has to calm down or else the captain would throw us off, which made her worse & i kicked myself for being weak & vowed not to do it again & by our second last day butterfly seemed better & we all couldn't wait to go home but i said never again & def wouldn't recommend it, so i made a promise to her that the next holiday will be more fun so compliments of a certain payment being backdated, in Dec we are going to Disneyland Paris & staying in the main Disney hotel, so she is all excited, & iv told her she`l see Santa to so now every day when the ads are on TV she informs us very very loudly `i want that to play with` which i reply we`ll see......
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